The Happy Nappy Bride

About weddings. About relationships. About the first year of being married.

and guest February 10, 2010

Filed under: Black weddings — Happy Nappy Bride @ 1:58 pm
Tags: ,

(I found this by Googling “happy Black couple…not bad, huh?)

The first of many pieces of advice I got about the wedding was that I must (must!) invite everyone as a pair…that it would be tacky not to let everyone bring a guest.  Now I’m all about etiquette (my mom had me writing thank you notes for gifts before I could spell my own name correctly) and think that’s it’s fabulous to have a set of behaviors that is generally agreed upon as “good”.

That being said, I was trying to figure out how on Earth I could invite everyone with a guest to a reception that will max out at 150 people.  Know what I decided?  Eff it.  I can’t give everyone a guest, sorry.  I’m sure some folks will say (behind my back of course) that I’m being uber rude, but I can’t sweat it.  I’ll take some snide comments rather than not inviting someone (who’s not in a relationship, but will scramble to find someone…anyone!…to fill that “and guest” role so that they’re not there without a date) who is very important to me, but not dating anyone seriously.

I suppose you can guess that since I like etiquette, that I love Martha Stewart.  Girrrl, she’ll make a twenty course meal and look at the camera and say that it was easy…and be serious!  Anyhoo, I was on the Martha wedding site and they say that I’m right!  Woo hoo!!  Go on over here and check it out, but here’s a snippet:

I sort of like the “you can only bring a date if you’re married (duh!) engaged, or living together” rule. Any less specific, and you’ve opened the floodgates: “But he told me he loved me! or “I slept over and he remembered my name!”

What are you and your sweetie doing about this?

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11 Responses to “and guest”

  1. Just Me Says:

    This is a tough one!! I am almost getting to the point where I will be sending out invites and have to make this decision. I want my guests to have fun but bottom line everyone cannot bring a date. I am not donald trump here. One thing to consider is if a person you are inviting solo will know a single soul at the wedding. If they won’t it might be ok to make an exception [as long as there aren’t too many] and let them bring a date but if they know people you will group them at the reception accordingly and they should be fine.

  2. Frugalista Says:

    This is a tough one!! I am almost getting to the point where I will be sending out invites and have to make this decision. I want my guests to have fun but bottom line everyone cannot bring a date. I am not donald trump here. One thing to consider is if a person you are inviting solo will know a single soul at the wedding. If they won’t it might be ok to make an exception [as long as there aren’t too many] and let them bring a date but if they know people you will group them at the reception accordingly and they should be fine.

  3. Cord Says:

    LOL!!!! @ the pic that came up when you “googled”. I love it! Anyway, FH an I are going with Martha on this, unless you’re married, engaged or have been dating for years, you don’t get a plus one. The only other exception I would make would be if the invited would know absolutely NO ONE else at the wedding but I’m pretty sure that’s rare.

    I think I can handle some behind my back talking for the sake of saving money!

  4. Tiffany In Houston Says:

    Woooo this is gonna be a hard one for me too. The majority of my close friends are single and out of a crew of 5 girls that hung out constantly I am the first one to get married. One of the girls is going to be a bridesmaid so that helps but the other girls aren’t dating anyone.. and having been a single way longer than I’ve been engaged at this point..I so sympathize with how they feel!!


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