The Happy Nappy Bride

About weddings. About relationships. About the first year of being married.

the problem dude’s have February 12, 2010

Filed under: Marriage — Happy Nappy Bride @ 1:05 pm
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When the Sex and the City movie came out, I drug The Mister to it and he was legitimately the only guy there.  Whoops.  I liked the movie for the same reason that most ladies did…pretty clothes, pretty shoes, witty banter.  Plus, Carrie was getting married and that was so cool, even though I would’ve rather she’d married Aiden.

Anyhoo, after watching the movie (well before we got engaged), The Mister’s like “see, you ladies get all wedding crazy…it’s like you don’t even care who you’re marrying, just that you’re getting married.”  For those of you who didn’t see the movie (really?), Carrie got a little nutty with wedding planning and kinda forgot about Mr. Big.  He started getting stressed because he worried that she just wanted a wedding.  All he wanted was a life partner…not an extravaganza disguised as a wedding.

I wonder if that’s every guy’s worry…that they’re just filling in a spot.  Even though a lot of us haven’t, I think guys still think that we’ve all been dreaming about weddings since we were little girls.  That doesn’t leave much room for him to feel special, that we wouldn’t have said yes to some other schmo who asked us to marry him.

I wonder if this is why I’m trying to be so laid back about the wedding planning…I don’t want The Mister to think that I don’t value what our life will be together.  That it’s all about the wedding and not the marriage.

Check out this post by a woman who’s about to marry a man who’s on his third marriage (like Mr. Big!) and isn’t all that fired up about the details…and she’s not happy about it.  Sidenote: The Mister and I just went through a chapter of one of our premarital books and one thing that we both agreed on…don’t complain about me/us to other folks.

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8 Responses to “the problem dude’s have”

  1. Tracey Says:

    I’m interested about the title of the Pre-marital book.

  2. buhdoop Says:

    I hadn’t thought about it, but i think that is a valid worry for guys. Kind of like the “don’t settle” thing we women (and men) say, well maybe the guys are like “is she settling on me to have a wedding?”

    PS. Do you have any advice on what premarital books to check out?

  3. Miss Journey Says:

    YES, Carrie should have def married Aiden. He was the best! but I also understood her anxiety. He was doing too much too soon, and that messed it up…smh

    I can see how guys can get a little concerned with a bride to be getting all crazy, but I also think she’s allowed. 🙂 That’s what (some) women do! I think there is a difference between a woman who is on love with her man and in love with the idea of her wedding. Yes you can have both, but I think there are signs to indicate which situation is at hand.

    On a side note: I almost feel bad for the guys who have the crazy brides. I may have watched too many episodes of Bridezilla…lol

    • dknytx Says:

      I don’t have cable, so I hadn’t seen all of those Bridezilla shows until Christmastime at someone else’s house. I tell you what, let me act like that…The Mister wouldn’t be around for all of that nonsense!


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