The Happy Nappy Bride

About weddings. About relationships. About the first year of being married.

respondez, s’il vous plait! May 3, 2010

Filed under: Pre-wedding — Happy Nappy Bride @ 3:22 pm
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This pic is from the invitation that I keep stashed away in my bag…yes, I have an invitation stashed away for whenever I feel like taking a peek at it.  What?  Is that weird?  I really like our invites and I’m super excited to be getting married, so whenever the feeling comes over me, I take it out, take a gander, then put it back in its envelope.

Anyhoo, we’re getting close to our RSVP deadline time, which of course means that I’m gonna have to become Magnum P.I. and track folks down.  So much of the process of planning a wedding is done by one person (me!) or at most, a few people…but once those RSVP’s are released, all bets are off!  Things are out of my control and I’m not happy about it, lol!  I don’t know about you, but it seems that the process has fallen into five different categories.

The go-getters.  We sent our invites out on a Monday and started getting replies in by Wednesday.  I thank these people not only because they allowed me to check something else off of my to-do list, but because it’s super exciting to receive the cards in the mail.  The early ones set my heart at ease because that meant that there weren’t any problems at the post office that I didn’t know about.  Now we’re at the point where it’s just fun to see who’s gonna be coming.

The hand-offs. They live close by, we happened to stop by, so they give us the reply card.  Now, don’t get me wrong…I’d rather have the card than not have the card.  But we spent money on stamps for every single reply card and it seems like such a waste to not put it in the mailbox.  Why must they rob me of the joy of seeing that wonderful copper envelope and ripping it open to see who it’s from?  Whyyyyyy?!!

The add-ons. We’re super excited they’re coming, they’re fired up to come…along with a plus one.  The problem is they weren’t given a plus one.  So here’s the process from there:  I check my guest list spread sheet just to be sure they’ve RSVP’d with the incorrect number.  I grumble to myself and anyone within earshot that they know they weren’t supposed to write that number down.  Most times it’s someone whose phone number I don’t have, so I’ve got to track that down so that I can call them and give them my “our reception venue is really small but if someone RSVP’s no, then I’ll try to slide your person in but right now we don’t have room for them” speech.  Those convos are awkward and typically very short.

The add-ons…part two. This is the way to request an additional person in my humble opinion.  They get their invite in the mail, see that it’s for a number that won’t work for whatever reason and they get in contact with me right away.  One reason for an add-on could be:  hey, me and my bf are coming up for the weekend and I’d already invited him to your wedding before I knew that I didn’t have a plus one.  He’s coming up to meet my fam for the first time and I thought it’d be fun if he met some of my old college friends.  If you can’t swing it I totally understand, but if you can I’d be super fired up. That seems reasonable, right?  And I appreciate the heads up rather than just writing in whatever number they wanted to, hmmmpft.

The MIA’s. Whether they’re in the wedding, so they don’t think they’ve got to send their card in (they do) or they think that we “know” that they’re coming (we don’t) or whether they just plain forget (it happens)…we’re missing a lot of reply cards.  We’ve made it so easy for everyone…there’s already a stamp on there for goodness sakes.  *sigh*  I plan on calling my fam and begging them to send in their cards so that it doesn’t seem like such a waste of money for those custom stamps.  I also plan on shaming those folks who forgot about sending it in to put it in the mailbox.  I know that they’re gonna want to tell me the answer rather than send it in, but I’ll tell them how much I love seeing those envelopes in the mail and hopefully that’ll work.

Are you having RSVP troubles?  How are you tackling it?