The Happy Nappy Bride

About weddings. About relationships. About the first year of being married.

more baby talk August 24, 2010

Filed under: Building a life,Marriage — Happy Nappy Bride @ 9:12 am
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The other day when I was getting my nails done, the lady doing my toes started chatting with me and asking about my new marriage.  Then, predictably, the convo turned to babies.  Now I go to this shop all of the time:  went there with my bridal party, have taken my step-daughter there…they know me by name.  And here’s one of the things that I hear a lot from the ladies:  have a baby to solidify your marriage.  I mean, she didn’t say it just like that, but that’s the gist.  She actually said that marriage would be “better” once we had kids.  For unmarrieds, this is generally seen as being the most ridiculous thing ever, but for marrieds…apparently not.  It seems that anchor babies are all the rage.

Another thing that I’ve heard since I was a youngin was when folks marry who’ve already got kids, they need to have their own right away to make it harder for one of them to leave.  I guess the reasoning is that if you have a kid between the two of you, then you’re more invested in the relationship.

Surely I’m not the only one who’s heard this kind of stuff.  Am I wrong to think it’s hooey?  Call me crazy, but I’d hope that The Mister is all in with me already and I don’t have to trick him into staying with me by having an anchor baby.   Plus, I’m pretty sure I read in a Psychology Today that folks who have kids have more arguments, less money, and have less bedroom shenanigans…that’s a better marriage? Now if I remember correctly, the article also said that even with all of those negative characteristics, people love being parents and wouldn’t change it for the world.

Of course The Mister and I plan on having some kiddos, but I’d hope that the desire behind it wouldn’t be to make sure the other person doesn’t go running in the other direction.

Have you guys heard of stuff like this?

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