The Happy Nappy Bride

About weddings. About relationships. About the first year of being married.

What do you think? March 10, 2011

Filed under: Marriage — Happy Nappy Bride @ 4:32 pm

A couple quotations from the latest Psychology Today:

When I ask Jean Twenge about marriage and happiness, the psychology professor at San Diego State tells me about her grandmother.  She ran a farm, gave birth to seven children, and was married to her husband until he died, shortly after their 51st anniversary.  It was a good marriage by all accounts.  “But she would have laughed in my face if I had asked her, ‘Was he your best friend?”

Now we expect our marriage partner to be our best friend and a great lover, a great parent and a soul mate, really good-looking and have a great sense of humor.  We have these expectations for marriage we can’t possibly fulfill.

Interesting huh?  I’d read this at the same time I read my Cosmo (trashy, I know) where the actress Michelle Williams was quoted as saying that we can really only expect another person to meet 60% of our needs…and if we get that, we should be pretty fired up.

I think these are right on!  One person can’t possibly be everything we want…isn’t that why we have community?  In that same PT article, the author talks about how our society is getting so insular. We stay at home to school our kids, we attend home churches, we’re working from home.  All of this puts even more pressure on “home” to bring us happiness.

What do you think?